Patience Is A Virtue

I am an impatient person. If something is desirable to me, I usually want it in my hands right now. Sure, growing up I was a bratty child because of this. I was always trying to fulfill this need. As I've grown up and matured, this has turned me into a highly emotional stubborn and attached (to the desirable objects) young woman. I've dealt with this in multiple situations and in various ways. Right now I am faced with it again.

I cannot stop my mind ever since it got started. Gasoline has been thrown on this fire, which doesn't help my cause. I am not saying this situation is anything negative; it's quite positive and I am pleased with it over all. I've just never had to deal with myself in a real way under these circumstances.

I just feel so impulsive and I don't want to have to wait. I understand that things in life get in the way and I respect other people's decisions, as I know they are right. I would have judged their character if they chose otherwise. I guess I am still childish and want all the attention to be on me.

I don't know how to shake this and I need to keep my cool, while remaining honest. For once, my heart and head are align but still, my emotions continue to be out of whack. Perhaps it's my fear of losing everything. I have so much hope and my heart is still young. I want to reach out and jump into life, but it's hard to be told to wait by someone you want.

So, I'll try to clear my head and focus on other things. This is harder than I could have ever imagined. To my friends who I constantly vent to: I love you and would go crazy without you!